I was famous for buying clothes that were too small. I used them as motivation. The goal was to lose weight so I could fit into them. My old self thought this was a brilliant plan. My evolved self knows this was a recipe for disaster.
I’ve been on this weight loss roller coaster for a long time, and there have been a lot of ups and downs. I hung on to my “skinny clothes” like a life vest, hoping they would help me lose weight any time I gained.
In the BARE program, there is one week devoted to decluttering your closet. The idea is to get rid of anything that doesn’t fit, anything that doesn’t make you feel amazing, and anything that doesn’t spark joy.
How do you think the clothes in my closet – the ones that were too tight – the stuff that was too small – were making me feel? What messages do you think those clothes were sending me?
On the surface, you may not recognize the harm.
You may not think it’s a big deal, but it is.
Every single time I looked at those clothes it was a reminder that I’m not where I want not be - that I’m not good enough – that I’m fat – that I’m not living up to my expectations. How do you think that was helping my self-esteem? How was that helping my goal? It wasn't. Not at all. It was doing much more harm than good, and ultimately keeping me stuck in the perpetual loop of yo-yo dieting.
Those clothes weren’t only taking up space in my closet. They were renting room in my mind & heart. They were crushing my soul.
Hanging on to clothes that don’t fit is like hanging on to dead weight. They hold you down. They serve no purpose except to remind you that something’s missing – that there is something wrong with who you are now. That’s not living in the present, and that is certainly not showing yourself any love. It’s a constant reminder of who/what you’re not. What if instead, you were to focus on all that you are – a strong, intelligent, and beautiful human being – with important shit to do!
The first time I decluttered my closet, I ended up with 12 bags of clothes that got donated (in the picture above). They were clothes that no longer fit me physically, and that no longer fit who I’m becoming. They were clothes from my corporate life, and my pre-cancer days. The truth is, even if they ever fit my physical body again, they wouldn’t fit who I am now. Once those clothes were gone, I felt like I lost 20lbs. There was room to breathe.
When I shop now, I focus on things that I love, and that fit. I pay attention to how the clothes feel on my body, and how I feel wearing them. I don't pay attention to the size, and that has made all the difference in the world. It's an amazing shift.
Do you have clothes that you’re still hanging on to?
Can you imagine letting them go?
What would you do with that space?