Many of us struggle with emotional eating and a negative body image. In this post I’m going to share some personal stories and insights from my journey, and hopefully, you’ll walk away with a new perspective on your relationship with food and how you view your body. So, grab a cup of coffee (or your favorite beverage) and let’s dive in, shall we?
In a Funk
First off, I want to start by saying—it’s okay to have bad days. Even as someone who coaches others on mindset and self-compassion, I have days where I just feel off. Recently, I was in a bit of a funk. My parents had come to visit for a long weekend, and when they left, I felt emotionally drained. That sense of emptiness when someone leaves is something I’ve felt before, and in the past, I used to turn to food for comfort.
Years ago, emotional eating was my go-to. I remember one particular moment when my parents left after visiting us in Georgia. I was alone in the house and found myself sitting on the couch, mindlessly eating Halloween candy. At the time, I was deeply entrenched in emotional eating, using food to distract myself from the sadness of their departure. This wasn’t a one-time thing—it was a pattern. Food became my companion, my friend, and my witness in times of loneliness or stress.
Food as a Companion and Witness
For many of us who’ve struggled with emotional eating, food plays more roles than just fueling our bodies. Food can become a distraction from negative feelings, a way to comfort ourselves, and even a witness to our emotions. It’s like food is always there for us, offering that non-judgmental presence we crave when life feels overwhelming. In moments of stress or sadness, food doesn’t criticize, it doesn’t tell us we’re wrong—it’s just there, steady and comforting.
But here’s the thing: food shouldn’t have to carry that burden for us. Looking back, I see that I was using food as a way to numb my emotions and avoid dealing with what was really going on inside. It’s easy to fall into that pattern, but it doesn’t actually make us feel better in the long run. Now, I don’t rely on food to deal with my emotions, and it’s a freedom I wish for everyone.
Our Relationship with Food: It Didn’t Start Yesterday
One of the biggest takeaways I’ve learned over the years is that our relationship with food didn’t form overnight. The way we interact with food today—whether it’s using food for comfort, celebration, or stress relief—was likely shaped a long time ago. For many of us, our earliest memories of using food in emotional ways go back to childhood. It’s often between the ages of 9 and 13 when we start developing these habits, whether it’s sneaking snacks for comfort or using food to rebel against rules or restrictions.
The tricky part? If these habits go unchecked, they grow stronger over time. You may be frustrated with your current relationship with food, but it’s important to remember that these habits didn’t form last week. They’ve been years in the making. That’s why it’s so crucial to have awareness and compassion for yourself as you start to untangle these patterns.
Body Image and Food: Two Sides of the Same Coin
Body image and our relationship with food are deeply connected. Just like our food habits, the way we see and feel about our bodies was shaped years ago. None of us come into this world hating our bodies—that idea is introduced to us at some point. Whether it was comments from family, peers, or media influences, those early messages about our bodies stick with us. And, just like emotional eating, they can become ingrained over time.
Ask yourself: When did you first start thinking negatively about your body? How old were you? What was going on in your life? The answers to those questions can provide powerful insights into why you feel the way you do about your body today.
The Power of Awareness
Here’s the good news: awareness is the first step to change. Once you start paying attention to the thoughts and feelings you have about food and your body, you can begin to untangle them. It’s like a ball of yarn—if you try to fix everything at once, it’ll just stay a mess. But if you gently pull on one thread at a time, the whole thing starts to loosen up.
It’s the same with emotional eating and body image. You don’t have to fix everything overnight, but by starting with small steps—like noticing when you turn to food for comfort or identifying negative thoughts about your body—you can begin to create real change.
Shifting from "Fat Mentality" to "Fierce Mentality"
I often talk about the shift from a “fat mentality” to a “fierce mentality.” The fat mentality is all those negative thoughts and feelings about our bodies that we’ve picked up over the years. They’re not even ours half the time—they’ve been passed down from family, society, or even the diet industry. The fierce mentality, on the other hand, is about reclaiming our thoughts, treating ourselves with kindness, and moving toward our goals from a place of self-love, not self-criticism.
When you start to embrace a fierce mentality, you begin to see that it’s not about striving for perfection or even loving every part of your body all the time. It’s about being kind to yourself in the process of change. You can still have goals—like losing weight or getting healthier—but you’ll approach them with more compassion and positivity.
Taking the First Step
If you’re struggling with emotional eating or body image issues, the first step is awareness. Take a moment to reflect on where these patterns might have started and what role food is playing in your life. Are you using it as a distraction? As a companion? And how do you really feel about your body?
Once you have that awareness, offer yourself some grace. These patterns didn’t develop overnight, and they won’t change overnight either. But with patience, compassion, and a little bit of untangling, you can start to shift your relationship with food and your body in a way that feels empowering.
Remember, you deserve to feel good about yourself—whether that’s in your body, your relationship with food, or your overall mindset. And I’m here cheering you on every step of the way.
Until next time, take care of yourself.
xo,
Amy
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