top of page

Taming the Drama Queen: Unmasking Your Inner Critic and Embracing Your Inner Ally

Amy English sitting on a bench

Have you ever stood in front of the mirror, dissatisfied with your reflection, and heard a voice whispering (or maybe shouting) critical judgments? "You look terrible in those jeans!" or "You'll never lose weight!" This, my friend, is your inner critic in all its glory.

The inner critic is that persistent voice in our heads that specializes in negativity. It dwells on our flaws, magnifies our mistakes, and fuels feelings of self-doubt. It can be a major roadblock to achieving our goals, particularly when it comes to building a healthy relationship with food and body image.

But here's the good news: You're not stuck with just the inner critic. We all have another voice waiting to be heard – the inner ally.

Let's explore how to identify the inner critic, challenge its negativity, and cultivate the supportive voice of the inner ally.

The Inner Critic: Your Uninvited Guest

The inner critic often stems from a place of wanting to protect us. It might point out potential dangers or flaws in our plans to keep us safe. However, its methods are often harsh and unhelpful.

Here are some ways the inner critic can show up:

  • Judgmental: It fixates on our flaws and mistakes, making us feel inadequate.

  • Discouraging: It whispers doubts and fears, hindering our motivation.

  • Comparative: It compares us to others, fueling feelings of insecurity.

  • Perfectionistic: It sets unrealistic standards, leading to disappointment and shame.

If left unchecked, the inner critic can wreak havoc on our self-esteem and emotional well-being. It can trigger emotional eating as a way to cope with negativity, ultimately leading to a cycle of self-sabotage.

Introducing Your Inner Ally: Your Biggest Cheerleader

The inner ally is the voice of reason, compassion, and encouragement. It wants us to be happy, healthy, and fulfilled.

Here's how the inner ally operates:

  • Self-Compassionate: It offers kindness and understanding after setbacks.

  • Supportive: It motivates us to keep going and celebrates our victories.

  • Empowering: It believes in our potential and encourages us to reach for our goals.

  • Body Positive: It appreciates our bodies for what they can do, fostering self-acceptance.

From Drama Queen to Dream Team: Quieting the Critic and Amplifying the Ally

The key is not to silence the inner critic completely but to find a healthy balance. Here are some tools to help you turn down the volume on the critic and turn up the volume on your inner champion:

  • Identify Your Inner Voices: Pay attention to your self-talk. When does the critic show up? What phrases does it use?

  • Challenge Negative Thoughts:  Don't accept the critic's judgments at face value. Ask yourself, "Is this thought helpful or hurtful?" "Is it based on reality?"

  • Reframe with Kindness: Rewrite the critic's message in a kind and supportive way, using the voice of your inner ally.

Developing Your Inner Ally:

  • Affirmations: Repeat positive affirmations about yourself and your body daily.

  • Gratitude Practice: Take time each day to appreciate your body for everything it does for you.

  • Self-Care: Prioritize activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul.

Remember, you are not alone in this journey. We all have inner critics, but we also all have the potential to cultivate powerful inner allies. By learning to manage your inner voices, you can break free from negative self-talk and build a more positive relationship with yourself, your food, and your body.

This blog post is just the beginning of your journey towards inner peace. Here are some additional resources to help you on your way:

For a deeper dive into healing your relationship with food and body image, consider my program, Fat2Fierce.  This self-paced program utilizes a non-diet approach to help you quiet your inner critic, embrace your inner ally, and finally break free from emotional eating.

You can learn more about Fat2Fierce here: 



11 views0 comments


bottom of page